I am trying to figure out how and where to plant a garden in my yard but I have some serious obstacles. As I mentioned before, I have two very wild and crazy dogs (Mya and Stewpot) from Bratislava (kidding) who have the run of my backyard. When I say “run,” it isn’t in jest. They have run through my backyard chasing critters and actually made the pachysandra retreat and die. We have a wooded lot, so there isn’t a perfect spot in the back to plant where I wouldn’t need a 6-ft fence to keep the mutts out.

The front yard is more lush (no dogs) but the deer have realized through their pee-mail network (my husband’s joke – we have email, critters have peemail) that the dogs don’t go there. I really should install a sneeze shield and take-out containers in the front because it is one giant deer salad bar. And, I don’t want to be the eyesore of the neighborhood by building a 6-ft fence around a garden plot (although the neighbor across the way is very unfriendly, which is an incentive to build something and paint it pink).. But I really want to grow vegetables. I refuse to take down trees and container gardening just doesn’t inspire me.

I need an intervention. My mom who is 82 tells me stories about the garden her father planted and how her mom got them through winters during the Depression by canning and storing every fruit and vegetable. We always had a large vegetable garden when I was growing up in Pennsylvania. I actually used to dislike it because one of my chores was weeding it. If I had to write a country song about it, it would be titled: I Was Composting Before Composting Was Cool.

CONGRATS TO BROOKLYN MAMA WHO IS THE WINNER OF THE COMMENT CONTEST AND WILL RECEIVE A COPY OF EARTH MATTERS :)  The contest is now closed, but comments are always welcome!

While I ramp up to go raw next week (for three months), I wanted to tell you all about the eco-friendly party I planned for my daughter’s 4th birthday this past weekend.    

This blog entry now has a comment contest!  I will choose a comment at random (once we hit 50 so tell all of your friends and frenemies) to win EARTH MATTERS book by DK Publishing, which is an excellent green guide for kids and explains everything from carbon to ecosystems.  It’s for ages 7+ but it has lovely photos so any kid or parent will enjoy!!

You know how parties go - some things worked, some didn’t.

Let me tell you what didn’t work first:

• I called a local nature center (Irvine Nature Center) to see if I could hire (or donate money) to have a nature education specialist walk the kids from the party through our woods and identify plants, trees and animals. I was going to make a field guide for the kids to use to identify the flora and fauna, and take photos of the walk to upload and make a photo book. Nixed. The nature center doesn’t do anything for private homes, even for a fee or freelance.

• If I had thought of the field guide idea earlier, I probably could have tracked down someone (a landscaper, local botanist, college professor) to do it, but it was too late. It’s still something I want to implement for another time because, well, those trees and squirrels aren’t going anywhere. Although I think it’s a great idea, but I would probably have a nature expert come a few days before the party so I can scout for poison ivy and prepare the guide before the guests come.

• I also failed at making little tea cakes using the Williams-Sonoma tea cake pan with a pound cake recipe. I suppose you have to only use their recipe to make the cakes come out properly. Mine stuck to the pan and wound up in the compost pile. However, I made a few crayon tea cakes from broken crayon pieces melted down, and these are super cute. Forget the cakes and make crayons.   We have had great luck using the “bug” pan from W-S for muffins (we call then “buggins”) and things, but this pan is so detailed that it’s hard to get the right result.

What worked:

Tea party theme:

• My husband’s mom is from Exeter, England, so we had the master make her famous scones (want the recipe?  Add a comment and I will post it) and cucumber sandwiches, which were a big hit.  We made them into “finger” and “toe” sandwiches by cutitng them with metal hand and foot cookie cutters (the plastic cookie cutters don’t cut sandwiches very well.)

• I didn’t realize that my daughter was stuffing scones into our homemade gourd bird feeder.  She wanted our feathered guests to feel welcome, too.

• I planned to just use my dishes and silverware instead of disposables but I ended up buying some eco-friendly plates because I panicked. We used regular silverware for the adults and some Zoopal plastic cutlery (which my sister had given us). We rinsed the eco-plates and put them in the recycling bin. 

• All of the food waste (dips that were in the sun, stale chips and some veggies) were composted.  We had very little left over.

• We didn’t go vegan, but we went vegetarian. It was a hot day, so I wanted to serve only cold food, so the menu also included:
  • Mozzarella balls, cherry tomatoes, basil in balsamic vinaigrette
  • Mexican pinwheels made from organic spinach tortillas, lowfat cream cheese, chopped sweet red peppers, chopped red onion and taco seasoning.  The extra filling was served with Trader Joe’s Organic Vegetable tortilla strips (we found the bear in the chip aisle and won a fruit leather on this trip to TJs).
  • Veggies with lowfat ranch dressing including these interesting pale yellow carrots I found at Wegman’s.  Everyone was amused by them although questioning the amount of beta carotene in yellow carrots (never invite scientists to a birthday party - total party poopers!).
  • Broccoli sprouts on everything except the cake
  • Blueberries, blackberries & raspberries (Intentionally, I left out any type of berries that had to be hulled or cut up to reduce prep time.  These berries were just washed and placed in bowls.

Desserts/Birthday cake:

• Did you know that a Christmas tree cake pan, if turned in the other direction, looks suspiciously like a crocodile? Add marshmallow eyes and teeth and Voila!

• I am a big fan of homemade cakes because you know exactly what is going into them.  We make our cakes with butter and sugar so they’re not health food but there aren’t preservatives if they’re made fresh in your own kitchen.   I couldn’t find any natural/organic food dye, which was the only bummer. But, I think kids enjoy helping with the food preparation, especially mixing and decorating cakes so we’re going the homemade route until my daughter declares it isn’t cool.
• We made “firecrackers” which are big pretzel rods dipped in dark organic chocolate with red, white and blue sprinkles.
• I had a sundae bar with ice cream and all sorts of toppings, all of which melted within seconds of being brought outside. I used glass sundae dishes instead of plastic or throwaway dishes just to add to the festivities. We’ll use these over and over for parties.

Drinks:

• Honest Tea has a new kids juice pouch which is organic and has less sugar. I love them, but my daughter doesn’t actually like them (the other kids seemed to really like them so you’ll have to judge yourself!). If you collect enough of the pouches, you can recycle them at Terracycle (www.terracycle.net).

• I made fresh iced tea in two flavors: decaf green tea and black tea. Both from Brassica tea products because that’s my husband’s company (www.brassica.com) and it’s also really great tea.  Kids actually will drink the decaf green sweetened with raw sugar or blue agave (my daughter likes hers sweetened with honey, both hot or cold tea).

• We planned to make fresh lemonade but simply ran out of time. I bought Newman’s Lemonade.

• Water. I know this is problematic to have bottled water, but I fought my conscience against hydrated guests or no plastic bottles but it was 90+ degrees. The bottles won.  I would have loved to give each guest a Sigg bottle if I had the budget or time. I have green guilt but all of the bottles were kept for my next mini-golf adventure.

Decorations:

• The table with the tea party setup and paper dolls was the main decorative element. I just took a piece of blue gingham fabric that I had from making my daughter a Dorothy (Wizard of Oz) costume and used that as a tablecloth.

•  The yellow envelopes on the table contain a color copy of the original Wee Wonderfuls doll pattern with some clothing. I made some smaller versions (5″) of the doll and also very small ones (1.5″ wine charms) which I punched a small hole, put an elastic ponytail band through, and tied up their goody bag with it. Inside the envelope was also a little wooden (flat) teapot and cupcake from Michael’s because, well, even paper dolls get thirsty and hungry!
• The little pitchers were actually from Wal-mart and they were with the measuring cups - I think the label said they were for creamer.  But, who doesn’t love little tiny pitchers?  Each girl could pour her own drink which is the best part of a tea party! I lined the washed pitcher with a paper toille napkin.
• The placemats are eeboo Fairies of the Garden wall cards which I laminated.  I put the letter of each girl’s first name at her place.
• Green toys has the BEST plastic tea set and cooking set, both of which I had on our table. The products are made in the US from recycled milk jugs and they’re pretty colors and totally kid friendly. ( http://www.greentoys.com/)
• I bought a real china tea cups (mismatched), teapot  and linen napkins from the local Goodwill for the party. They were cheap, adorable and replaceable. Plus, these are things I can see being used for years and years on the playdate circuit and even for grownups. I like to buy things second-hand and multipurpose them.

Games:

• You just can’t beat eeboo for the coolest party games (www.eeboo.com). We had:
  • Stick the Fairy on the Flower. The gorgeous fairy poster was too pretty to just tape on a door, so I put it in a large IKEA poster frame and we stuck the fairies on the front.  The poster is now hanging in our playroom for future playdates.
  • The Tea Party game (our favorite)
  • The Picnic Game
  • Go fish card game
• Unfortunately, no one played any of the games at the party because everyone was outside, but my daughter loves them and we played them all the next day. Great for little girl playdates or smaller settings.

• I made a mini-golf course out of recycled cardboard, cream cheese tubs, boxes and plastic.  I have to admit some of the “holes” were lame but the party goers were all 4 years old, so I kept it simple. I was also worried about rain so I didn’t put as much time into it as I could have.

• I named each hole (9 holes total, I think) after each partygoer (Pizza Mia, Mimi’s Pet Shop, Sam’s Bagels, Lily’s Flower Shop, Ava’s Kites, Elisa’s Ice Cream, Tony’s Broccoli Sprouts and Fill Dirt (inside joke), and Izzy’s Beach Rentals). I took everything from a toy dump truck to an inflatable bagel and made them into easy putts (See photos.) Next time, I plan to make fewer “holes” and make them a little more complex. I think everyone spent most of their time playing golf.
• I bought straw hats and used leftover ribbon and craft supplies for the girls to decorate. It was a cute idea but the kids just wanted to play outside so no one decorated a fancy hat (sniff).  I was going to have a “pink carpet” made from a roll of pink floral wallpaper to make a fashion show when the girls finished their hats, but that whole idea flopped.  I think that’s an idea for next time.
• I downloaded a free gorgeous paper doll template from Wee Wonderfuls (weewonderfuls.typepad.com/wee_wonderfuls/store/paperdolls.html). I transferred the pdf into Photoshop and change each doll’s eye and hair color to match the partygoer. I printed them out on photo paper and laminated. I then thought of a way to dress them without glue, tape or other messy things by using post-it notes.  I simply cut a post-it note into the shape of the lavendar dress you see in the paper doll photo below. The sticky part of the note were at the doll’s shoulders. The post-it notes can be decorated with markers, stickers, etc… Those super sticky notes work the best).
• I made smaller versions of the paper dolls for “wine charms” for the girls’ party favors and cups. No one played with these, either (double sniff). I found a bag of hard foam blocks (from when we had our rugs cleaned – used to lift furniture off of rug) and made these the holders for the dolls. They didn’t have enough weight so I glued on glass marbles.

1. I also ordered Kites on a Roll (http://www.kitesonaroll.com/) which are recyclable kites that come 20 per roll for about $40. You can also add on biodegradable tails. The kites are packed by people with disabilities and the company owner is a sweetheart, so this company is a wonderful find. Only a couple of kids did this craft.

• Outside, we had squirt guns, chalk, bubbles, tents and balls. Despite the heat, the kids pretty much played with this stuff or the mini golf.
• We received various kid tents as gifts so they were outside and the kids seemed to enjoy playing in them.

The goody bags:

• I made a mix CD for the party so I just made copies for the guests and made my own CD covers which can be colored by the birthday girl or her guests.  The songs were dance tunes from Will Smith (Switch) to Deee-Lite (Groove is in the Heart).
• One rock candy stick (it would have been fun to swizzle in the lemonade tea party if they had been inside!)
• One homemade hair bow.
• They took home the paper doll, mini lemonade pitcher and kite. Somehow, the hats remained behind but we’ll try the hat decorating again soon with a playdate.

Invite the best guests in the world:

• Our guests were so kind. My daughter was thrilled that her teacher, our friends and neighbors came to celebrate her special day.
• Everyone helped keep the kids happy and hydrated. Everyone helped get the food out and in, even my friend Sher who is due with baby #1 any day.

Lessons learned:

• Have babies in cooler months. June birthdays are hot ☺
• Don’t panic and add additional food and beverage items. People don’t eat that much at parties, especially in the heat.
• Limit the crafts/activities. I had plans B,C,D, and E in case of rain which was too much. But, we had so much fun prepping for the event; my daughter and I had made paper dolls, picked out tea sets, decorated the table, and made a kite.
• Hire a babysitter or ask a friend to come over the morning before the party starts so the birthday child is happy and occupied. You’re rushing around to get things out (no matter how much you do in advance) and everyone is calling and it becomes pandemonium.
• Do your best when it comes to recycling and reducing consumption. Make it easy for guests to toss cans and bottles in the recycling bin. Make food fresh instead of from packages. And, if you do have waste, compost it or turn it into a mini-golf course!

I completely forgot my daughter’s lunchbox today at school. I spend a fair bit of time preparing her fare, so it wasn’t just a sammy with chips.

It’s a lot of work to make her waste-free lunch:

• I use a thermal bag made from recycled plastic
• a wrap n mat for sandwiches
• I do use plastic (EEK!) containers with twist on tops for things like cucumber slices, hard-boiled egg and grapes
• I really have to get a bento. Considering my husband goes to Japan regularly, I imagine it won’t be that hard. Check this link out for cool lunch box ideas, www.lunchnugget.com. The original bento lunchboxer is here www.veganlunchbox.com. Inspirational, albeit a little intimidating.

Anyhow, back to the left lunch. I seriously contemplated pulling a Ferris Bueller and having a pizza and lemonade delivered to her classroom because I was in such as rush to meet some Kiwi and other deadlines. But, I sucked up the carbon footprint and drove home to retrieve the left lunch. Fortunately, it was out of doggy reach and still safe.

Admittedly, I had several phone meetings and articles to write, but I was rushing because I had a hair appointment. I am one of those people who goes to the salon about 3 times a year, and I always call to make my appoint within 4 hours of getting it cut (I wake up, decide I have to have my hair cut, and call around til I find someone to do it). I go to this cool place called FX Studios (just north of Baltimore MD - www.fxstudios.com and I had a new stylist named Grace who was very sweet and gave me a great cut. You can watch a movie as you get your hair cut (it reminds me of those kiddie cut places where the kid is parked in front of a DVD so they won’t notice). The funny part of the cut to me was the review of all of the hair products as organic, natural and vegan. I’m all for it but the chances of me using 8 hair products in one hair styling event at my home is about nil. I did like that they had a whole lobby full of natural nail care products which work really well and don’t peel off in sheets when you take a shower.

I was making my family some brownies the other night and the two of them would have eaten the whole batch if I hadn’t had a sugar intervention.

Here’s where the nickname came in.

I looked over at my daughter and she had a streak of brownie goo which connected her two eyebrows. The resulting name (which I won’t utter in front of her)?

Unibrownie.

I think it’s interesting the way we label everything and everyone. I was uneasy being a vegan mainly because I wasn’t sure I could live up to the regulations associated with the name. Would people judge me for wearing leather shoes? Or scrutinize my beverages? So, I’m not a big fan of labels.

I think that might be the key to something the trendsters are calling green guilt. You try really hard to recycle, compost, reduce waste, carry a water bottle, eat local, eat plants, grow your own…but then you get to the gym and forget the water bottle. Or you jump on a treadmill and feel guilty because the thing is plugged in. It should be the other way around, right? If you pedal, run, step or walk, shouldn’t you be generating electricity?

My green guilt comes from my house, mainly. I am desperate to install solar panels, get rid of my lawn with attractive moss and groundcover, have a huge and bountiful garden (impervious to deer and bunnies), get a new eco-mattress for every bed and ditch the rugs for renewable wood floors. But, it’s not in the budget in the short-term. And, you have to remove things which have to be recycled, disposed of or somehow evaporated.

We do our best.

What is the past tense of vegan?

Vedone?
Vegone?
Vewitched, bothered and vewildered?

Here’s the deal. I love being Edamommy (I am keeping the moniker) and my alter ego, The Vegan Mary. I also like to think of myself as the 40-year-old Vegan.

But, I am ready for a new challenge, and that’s where you come into the picture. I happened to catch an episode of Sex and the City where Miranda described non-dairy vegan ravioli as kindergarten paste. Foreshadowing? I am wrapping up this vegan venture soon just because it’s time for something new to fuel my ruthless journalistic fire. I never reached the point where I fed my dogs kiddle (that’s the soy version of kibble) but I think I gave this gig a fair shot.

I have some options here. Eventually, I would love to have a gig like Matt Lauer where I am sent around the world to tropical places where someone carries my bag and does my hair and makeup, but the publisher hasn’t agreed. Yet.

So, where are we adventuring next? You can rate these items with the following – *YAWN* OR *DARE YA* (as an added bonus, feel free to suggest your own theme song)
1. Raw foods - This one makes me really nervous. My editor calls this vegan x 10, which of course makes me really want to try it. (Theme song: If lovin’ you is RAWNG, I don’t want to be right)
2. Waste-free kitchen – all compost, no plastic waste, waste-free lunches (Theme song: Guns n Roses Welcome to the Jungle)
3. Shopping diet - Not even my favorite thrift shop. Nothing except food staples. Or food and staples. (Smokey Robinson – Shop Around)
4. Keep on vegan, baby! (I can’t think of a song except Last Night a Vegan Saved my Life)
5. Your suggestion? Keep it clean and legal, please.

And here’s the coolest part! By just voting with your comments, you can be randomly chosen to receive a really awesome vegetarian cookbook.

I will announce the results of the vote in late June.

It seems only fitting to introduce a new theme song. I chose Madonna’s Like a Virgin.

I made it through the wilderness
Somehow I made it through
Didnt know how lost I was
Until I found tofu.

I was meat incomplete
I’d been had, I was sad and blue
But you made me feel
Yeah, you made me feel
Shiny and new

Like a vegan…

Here’s an interesting list for you to chew on. A well-known animal rights organization has a list of everyday junk food that is vegan. I’m not saying it’s healthy or good, but it’s vegan approved.

Things that are vegan:
Krispy Kreme Fruit Pies (Peach)
Thomas New York Style Bagels (Plain)
Ghirardelli Hot Chocolate (Double Chocolate)
Kool-Aid Drink Mix
Nabisco Uh-oh Oreos, Spring Oreos, Chocolate Creme Oreos
Newman-O’s (Chocolate Crème)
Pez Candy
Smarties (U.S. version only)
Ben & Jerry’s Jamaican Me Crazy Sorbet
Mrs. Smith’s Dutch Apple Crumb Pie Slices
Froot Loops
Pop Tarts (Unfrosted Strawberry)

Things that are not vegan:
Grilled salmon
Plain yogurt
Skim milk
Honey
Most sushi

I am having a major Andy Rooney moment. Not the unfortunate eyebrows part, but the “did you ever wonder” part. Did you ever wonder why all of the new diet books on the shelves are just plain mean?

The latest trend seems to be “if we abuse you, you will lose you.” Not that I need a big, authentic, reaffirming Oprah/Eckhart virtual hug every day (Imagine a day where Oprah, Eckhart, Oz and Uma are all on one show) but even Mary Poppins knew that a spoon full of sugar attracts more bees or something like that.

I just want to know what the appeal is of all of these new books that ridicule readers, oh, and happen to have a vegan-agenda. The books remind me of that girl in my college sorority who would say something nasty, always followed by the word ‘kidding” and some smug grin.

If you bought one of those books and crossed out all of the expletives and nonsense commentary with a black marker, it would read like a redacted FBI document.

Maybe I have become a humorless, cranky vegan who needs more vitamins but I could use a little more Elvis Costello – what’s so funny about peace, love and understanding?

I have never been a picky eater and I really get annoyed when dining with one. My nieces who are 18 and 20 still only eat food that usually comes with crayons and a seek-n-find placemat.

I find that to be ridiculous, although my daughter has narrowed her food selections significantly lately. She used to eat bean chili (extra mild), burritos, guacamole and bean salad. Now, it’s chicken, eggs, Caesar salad (my influence), plain pasta and pizza (and Cheetos with dad when I’m not around. But it’s hard to hide a Cheeto-fest with all of that orange evidence). She will eat a lot of fresh fruit and veggies (especially broccoli sprouts) as I mentioned, but I am trying to broaden her horizons a little.

She even drinks decaf green tea, but she is the dairy queen, ruler of all things milky and cheesy. She even asks me to tell her bedtime stories about milk. The one we made up is (scroll down to the next day if you can’t even stand the thought of reading this):

Once upon a time, there was a beautiful girl named Miriam and she lived in a castle with her dogs Mya and Stewie. And this princess loved milk. Milk, milk,milk. Milk for breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, dinner, snack. And cheese. And yogurt (“Mom – don’t forget to say ‘yogurt drinks’, too.”) But one day, there was no more milk in the kingdom of Talalay. Not one drop. Every sippy cup was empty. Princess Miriam was so sad. She asked her mom, “Hey Mom! Where’s all of the milk?” “Dunno” Princess Miriam realized if she wanted answers, she’d have to investigate it herself. She went straight to the dairy farm and asked the cows. The cows’ publicist issued this statement: ”Due to the fact that no one says thank you for milk and very few children even know where milk comes from, we are no longer providing milk.” So, Miriam says, “Well, I can understand how you feel. I love milk and I love you. Thank you for all of the milk you’ve ever given me.” From that day on, there was milk for everyone, occasionally chocolate. THE END NOW GO TO BED

I have been telling more people about my vegan venture. Some people think it’s cool and trendy. Others think I have lost my mind. I have given up coffee, too, and my sister thinks that alone qualifies me for a 5150 in California.

The coffee part isn’t going very well at all. I think about coffee a lot and sneak it. Always decaf. I switched to soy and stevia. But, it’s still coffee, no matter how you grind the bean.

I was in the Peace Corps in the former Soviet Union from 1998 to 2000. I joined when I was 32. Talk about raising eyebrows!

Going vegan is nothing compared to telling friends and family I was ditching it all, getting rid of most of my stuff and moving to a country no one has ever heard of. Slovakia is the former half of Czechoslovakia and is bordered by Poland, Austria, Ukraine, Czech Republic and Hungary. Speaking of Hungary, I’m starving.

I’m almost three weeks into this vegan thing. I don’t look different. I don’t feel different. I try to run 3 miles every day and I’ve been struggling more than usual.

Temptations are getting harder. I’m knocking on mozzarella’s door. I want a quickie with quiche. I can’t fight this feeling anymore (sorry – a new theme song from REO Speedwagon is trying to invade the Supreme’s space and I am blocking it with all of my vegemight).

I am going to renew my commitment to being a vegan. I want to make vegan friends. No more secret meatings. No more raving cravings. I am renewing my efforts. Starting tomorrow.

I have a soy dream.

I cheated. Now I am a cheatin’ vegan. I am a fair-weather vegan.

In my defense, I have been dedicated and fearless in the face of pudding, ranch dressing and Brie. It was a big date with my husband who has been traveling a lot lately. We rarely get a night out alone. I had a vegantini (no animals were harmed, but I think I was) and my inhibitions were down.

I wanted it. I had to have it. I couldn’t keep my hands off of it.

No, I’m not going to get spicy here. I wanted meat. Specifically pot stickers and a sashimi tuna martini. And they tasted amazing. Sure, I felt a little guilty but it was with my husband and it didn’t mean anything. It was just physical. It won’t happen again, I swear. I’ll go to counseling. I’ll do anything for another chance.

Say you want to try vegan food and don’t want to have to cook different meals for your family. In the early stages, it’s daunting and time-consuming to figure out how to maintain nutritional balance and not fall back into old patterns. Prepare to be amazed. Two words: Hungry Vegan. Meet Amy Townsend. (Amy, Future Vegan. Future Vegan, Amy.) Now kiss and hug her. Amy started the Hungry Vegan (www.hungry-vegan.com) which is a company that ships prepared organic vegan meals nationwide. I don’t live in Manhattan and even getting the pizza guy to find my house is a struggle, but somehow Amy managed to send a cooler of vegan food to my doorstep. It’s some of the best food I have ever tasted. The mushroom bisque with thyme was delicious and cleared my sinuses. For around $85 per week (delivery charges vary based on location), I have been eating delicious, nutritious food which requires minimal prep time. Amy has about 50 clients per week who order her prepared meals and most of them are women (she also mentioned that most of their names start with the letter J. I would have thought V). Her next step is to launch a second vegan menu geared toward reversing diabetes and heart disease. It will be a no oil/no salt added/low glycemic diet that follows the guidelines of the Physicians’ Committee for Responsible Medicine. As the Vegan Mary, I hereby declare Amy to be Vegemighty.

 I am re-running this post to get your Friday creative juices flowing.  It’s a comment contest!!  I am going to choose, at random, one person to receive a Wrap-n-mat reusable sandwich wrap for the best new moniker for vegans (nothing snarky, please).  I know, I know - Edamommy already suggested such good ones.  But try your best.  The Vegan Mary is already taken.  I’ll announce the winner in one week and send you your Wrap-n-mat. Ready - set- comment!  I see these comment contests work, so stop back often for more prizes.

One edamommy attempts to cut meat out of her life.

Now that I am an experienced vegan of two weeks, I feel I need to lobby to change the moniker. Vegan doesn’t sound welcoming or happy. I came up with a few which I will try out on the public: Edamommy - nurturing, warm and happy, but gender-specific Vega - the brightest star in the constellation Lyra (I think it should rhyme with Degas) Vegas - already taken but very interesting how one small letter change makes a huge difference. Fun, festive and a little naughty Vegemighty - sounds like a new superhero – if you eat xx amount of vegan food, you could earn a superhero cape!Veggin - friendlier and hip - Just veggin’Weeeegan! - way more funThe Vegan Mary - I guess that would only apply to me and other Marys-”Edamommy” Mary Talalay is a writer for KIWI Magazine

I belong to a moms’ group and one of the members is an amazing artist (www.happytomatokids.com). She is also a meat maven, pork princess, lamb lover, veal vixen, hamburger helper and a chicken champ. She stalks follows famous chefs and all of their culinary creations. We are the Laverne and Shirley, the Odd Couple, the Charlotte and Samantha, or the Homer and Ned Flanders of the great meat debate. We discovered our dueling blogs (hers is www.happyhoarfrost.com) through a mutual friend. Turns out, my meat-loving friend just ate her with f-f-f-fava beans. You’ll have to look up the term hoarfrost on your own. I can assure you it only sounds naughty.

One edamommy attempts to cut meat out of her life.

I have to say, the ramp-up time is more significant than I ever imagined. Do you realize how many products contain some form of animal in them? And honey?Some very strict vegans won’t consume certain sugar products or wines because of the way they’re filtered.I have to just look the other way when it comes to the wine. You can only ask for so much.I keep saying (joking) that I am going to write a book (I actually am writing a book about being 32, single and joining the Peace Corps, but that’s another entry for another day) called Chicken Soup for the Vegan Soul.Surprisingly, people are taking me seriously. Either my bagel disequilibrium has really thrown me off course, or I am just not funny. I am going to write to the Chicken Soup publisher and see if they bite on the idea. I guess maybe I am turning into one of those people that says “It’s not the heat, it’s the humidity.”

One edamommy attempts to cut meat out of her life.

I know I am not a full-fledged vegan. I’m still not sure joining TV (Team Vegan) is my ultimate destiny.But, on a non-vegan front, I believe I may have reformed the Reform Judaic Seder at my daughter’s preschool with a decidedly non-vegan move. I was asked to bring hard-boiled eggs to the Seder celebration yesterday and I posed what I thought was a typical question: peeled or unpeeled? Then, I happened to mention to the preschool director that I buy eggs already hardboiled and peeled.Complete silence.“You do what?”Feeling sheepish at my flagrant lack of knowledge of Seder customs, I responded “I buy them already cooked and peeled.”“You can buy them cooked and peeled???” They responded in unison in complete disbelief. “Where, oh where, can we buy these eggs?”

Apparently, making the hardboiled eggs is a major thorn in the side of Seder prep, at least for these two women. Ironically, we attended the children’s Seder and the meal that followed; someone had made their own eggs and they were not cooked all of the way through (Salmonella Seder?). Sometimes it pays to cheat.I have to tackle one other awkward non-vegan/Seder subject. I have to admit something, in addition to the embarrassing habit of choosing theme songs for events in my life (see Day 1).I fall down miserably when it comes to bagel equilibrium. Bagel equilibrium is achieved when you have enough bagels and their accoutrements including cream cheese (I eat with peanut butter now) and broccoli sprouts (more on sprouts later – I married into the broccoli sprout empire so there might be some shameless promotion for www.brassica.com).I always am short of one ingredient—tubs of cream cheese, no bagels, no sprouts; dozen bagels, no cream cheese, 3 boxes of sprouts. You get the picture.So, I finally, finally reached bagel equilibrium and now it’s Passover. No bagels, just matzah for a week.Happy Passover. I hope you achieve unleavened equilibrium.

One edamommy attempts to cut meat out of her life.

The most challenging part of this transition is not at all what I expected. I don’t miss meat (yet). I am ok with soy yogurt, although I wouldn’t want to be stranded on a desert island with it yet. The most difficult part is the time it takes to read through every ingredient and really try to determine if the product could be vegan. I love when the product actually says it’s vegan right on the label because it cuts my shopping time significantly. I just want to thank Amy’s Kitchen for a) labeling their products vegan (or not) and eliminating my neophyte guesswork AND b) making really delicious vegan food. Why, they even have vegan pizza! I am trying to eat tons of fresh fruit and veggies, but there are just some evenings where I am making dinner for my beloved meat eaters (or they want to eatpizza) and I can not be tempted because I have a few prepared foods on hand. It’s not an every day occurrence but it is very helpful as an option.

Amy’s Kitchens also has an awesome section on their website about using their food to diet. I think it’s pure genius. I have a family member who goes on one of those commercial diet plans every year for about 6 months and it costs a lot of money (she told me $100 or more per week in food when you include fees and delivery). My theory is to buy healthy frozen food from Amy’s, buy lots of fresh, organic fruits and vegetables and buy a great pair of walking shoes with the money you save on fees. Amy’s gives you free downloadable diet and other tools. I have a trip planned this week so I am going to give it a whirl when I return. Let me know if you’ve tried it. I need to lose this baby weight before my baby is driving. I am also trying to keep everything organic as much as possible. You can certainly eat a lot of junk or less healthy food as a vegan, so keeping it fresh and organic is important to me. One of my dearest friends (Hi Jessica!) warned me that, when she went vegetarian 12 years ago (she’s mostly vegan from what she described), she managed to find every junk food product possible. Jessica and I have a major sugar addiction which we are trying to tame (any ideas out there?) I switched to stevia and blue agave (and just raw sugar), but I am talking sweets like chocolate and baked goods. Every time I write my blog, I get hungry. -”Edamommy” Mary Talalay is a writer for KIWI Magazine

Although I did not set out with a strategy to veganize, it is evolving slowly. I am trying many of the convenience foods out of sheer curiosity. I have to think it’s easier now than ever to be a vegan because all of our vegancestors (I just made that word up) experimented with egg, cheese, milk and meat substitutes and figured out a way to make most of it taste good and be better for you. The vegan cheese I tried goes in the same category as carob; it looked like cheese, smelled like cheese and tasted like toe jam or a refrigerator science experiment. Should cheese be spongy? In my experience, the only edible cheese that is spongy is cheesecake. I just had a Homer Simpson moment. Mmmmmmm. Cheesecake. Although I want to reduce my family’s meat consumption, it does concern me that there are so many ingredients in packaged meat-replacement products. As this vegan-venture continues, I still want to try prepared foods periodically, but plan on finding great cookbooks so I cook fresh ingredients and healthier dishes.

My very picky daughter loves Morningstar Farms chicken nuggets which I mistakenly assumed were vegan. But, she eats chicken or turkey most days so I am happy to find what I think may be a healthier option. Happily, she eats fruit and vegetables with gusto. I don’t give her very much packaged food but I do keep some on hand for emergencies or general lack of preparation on my part (you know – it’s 5:45 and you have no idea what dinner will be). Through our highly scientific testing (I eat one, my daughter eats one, the dogs each get one), not all “cheatin’ chicken” nuggets are created equal. I found some (brand shall remain nameless) which are vegan and no one could eat them. They had a grey, spongy (do you notice a theme about eating spongy food?) interior and there were not enough condiments in my house, even the hot buffalo wing sauce I put on everything, to cover up those bad actors. The dogs seemed to enjoy them, but they often eat inappropriate things. Including my daughter’s Easter basket (just the basket, not the contents.)-”Edamommy” Mary Talalay is a writer for KIWI Magazine

One edamommy attempts to cut meat out of her life.

I read an article in the New York Times about vegansexuals. That’s a new one. So, pity the poor singletons today who not only have to worry about finding true love, but now they have to make sure they are culinary-compatible. I met my husband when I was 37 and he was 49 and I am soooooo happy that I never had to worry about smelling like meat or worrying that my yogurt addiction was detrimental to my relationship. The article was alarming. Does your date eat some meat, no meat, no eggs, some dairy? Holy cow! Time to get a dog. They don’t care. They lick you when you come home all sweaty from the gym, think the mailman looks scrumptious and think you are agorgeous, intelligent, witty genius.

One quick Google and I see there are many lifestyle-based internet dating sites; I’m talking food orientation. The home page of one of the sites has a couple kissing next to a buffet of vegetable crudités (uh-oh – I spy ranch dressing:. “You’re not a vegan! You lied to me! You probably eat hot wings in your closet. You, you cheatin’ vegan!”)Well, I am shouting it from the mountaintops: I am a vegan (sort of) and I am in love with a bone-afied meat-eater! There. I said it. -“Edamommy” Mary Talalay is a writer for KIWI Magazine

One edamommy attempts to cut meat out of her life.

I have a question.

There’s Tofurky, soy hot dogs, fakin bacon and soy sausage. In theory, you can use soy to make any kind of meat, right?

So, I think we should get really creative. If it’s just soy and not real critter, then why not:

Tofeasal – weasel

Tomingo – flamingo

Tofunky – monkey

Tofoceros – rhinoceros

Tofuffalo – buffalo

Tolar Bear

“Honey, your toshrew is getting cold!” “I’m not sure what goes best with tofaardvark. White or red?” “Mmmm. I’ll have the steamed tofedgehog.”I just don’t see why not. If it’s not meat anyway, let’s get exotic! It will probably all taste like chicken, only gamier.

-”Edamommy” Mary Talalay is a writer for KIWI Magazine

One edamommy attempts to cut meat out of her life.

I haven’t mentioned how I am going to approach the non-food side of veganism. I do own leather shoes and handbags. I am sure some of my cosmetics have lanolin and honey. When I was a Pre-V (pre-vegan), I bought mostly organic food and more natural cosmetics and products. Although I won’t be removing all non-vegan items from my home, I won’t be buying any more items which contain animal products for myself, and I’ll try to find non-animal substitutes for my family.

Here’s a loophole which I plan to exploit shamelessly. I am a big fan of consignment and thrift shops, so I feel less guilty about giving clothes a second life even if they contain wool or leather.

I went to my local Goodwill today and I spent $9 on clothing. Here’s what I got in the kids department: Three Laura Ashley summer dresses, two flannel-lined jeans, two Gymboree capris, one very sparkly dance leotard, one Hanna Andersson spring dress, a light spring jacket, a VHS tape (the Wiggles with Bindi the Jungle Girl) and an Elmo book that talks. Nothing I bought had any animals in it, but the VHS tape had animals on it (that’s ok).

Hope I am still in good standing with all of the vegans I haven’t met. Not sure how I will know if I am not. I wonder if a little “V” will appear on my forehead, like Harry Potter’s lightening bolt.

-”Edamommy” Mary Talalay is a writer for KIWI Magazine

One edamommy attempts to cut meat out of her life.

Ok, I know it’s early in the ve-game, but this experience has really made me think about people with food allergies, or worse, parents with allergic kids. I read all the labels, try to make sure there are no animal ingredients and away I go. If I make a mistake, the worse that can happen is that I figure it out later and avoid that product, lie to my readers and doom myself to eternal fire.

In other words, there is absolutely no risk. But any such ingredient can prompt an array of reactions in those with food allergies, from an itchy nose to anaphylactic shock.

Nutritional labels are nearly impossible to read with the tiny type and chemical speak. I took my 3-year-old daughter grocery shopping and it was impossible to read every label while simultaneously preventing an avalanche in the produce aisle in Whole Foods. (By the way, that’s a whole separate blog—those stacks of fruits and vegetables are rigged. One wrong orange or apple choice and thewhole thing comes tumbling down.) I didn’t feel the least bit confident that I had purchased only foods without animal products in any form.

When I got home, I had to go on several websites to make sure I had purchased a genuine vegan item. In some cases, I hadn’t. All told, I feel pretty lucky that we don’t have food allergies in my family and that this is a risk-free learning adventure. Except for the eternal fire part.

-”Edamommy” Mary Talalay is a writer for KIWI Magazine

One edamommy attempts to cut meat out of her life.

My limited exposure to vegans included a co-worker who used to special order vegan jelly beans (without animal gelatin). He also patiently explained the notion of Tofurky to me (tofu-turkey). He was skinny and pale and, let’s just be honest here, no poster child to join Team Vegan.

But, I have been noticing more and more vegan cookbooks, diet books and even articles in the mainstream media about vegans. MLB pitcher Roger Clemens was asked by Congress in February 2008 during the steroid hearings if he was a vegan since he was receiving B12 injections (prompting a well known pro-vegan organization to send him an animal-free snack pack). NFL tight end Tony Gonzalez was featured in a January 2008 article about going on the vegan wagon (vagon). And, the lovely Natalie Portman has teamed up with té casan for an animal-free shoe line (these will be Edamommy - free since the prices are in the hundreds, unfortunately).

I think the increasing interest and action to be embrace the environment has made veganism very vogue. There are lists of celebrities on the internet who claim to be vegan (and I am sure the paparazzi are trying their best to catch them with a burger or milkshake).

Holy Buf-faux-lo Wings! I think there is a paparazzo rifling through my recycling right now to see if my yogurt containers are soy or not.

False alarm. Just a raccoon.

-”Edamommy” Mary Talalay is a writer for KIWI Magazine

One edamommy attempts to cut meat out of her life.

My family is not joining me on my adventure, although I will make vegan recipes for all of our meals and add in extras. At first I contemplated being a covert vegan, but I thought it would be too hard to keep this on the down low without making my family suspicious. Veganism is a sea change from my normal routine.

My husband’s exact words: “If you get nutty on this, you’re stopping.” (I am secretly glad he said “get nutty,” as opposed to “get nuttier”). I intend to get nutty, silly! It’s all about nuts, beans, legumes, vegetables and fruit! Ship a’soy!

And, let me just say, there are not enough emoticons on the Internet to express my excitement over finding The Joy of Vegan Baking by Colleen Patrick-Goudreau. The author’s book and website, www.compassionatecooks.com, not only have recipes for chocolate chip cookies and other treats, but every vegan resource you can imagine. I had no idea that you could still pig out and be vegan.

Not skinny-model pig out, but suburban mom-with-ice-cream- tub-calling-my-name, toddler-dodging-bedtime, dog-rolled-in-something, husband-away-on-business pig out. Really, how hard can this be if you can eat mousse?

I only have Colleen to thank (or blame) for the fact that I found vegan chocolate chips that are made from real chocolate. Not carob. Never carob. Carob hasn’t changed since I tasted it in the ’70s. There is nothing right about carob. Notice the second syllable is rob? That’s no mistake. It looks like chocolate, smells like chocolate and tastes like dirt. I hope the carob council doesn’t come after me like the beef producers went after Oprah.

-”Edamommy” Mary Talalay is a writer for KIWI Magazine

One edamommy attempts to cut meat out of her life.

My husband describes me as Farfromvegan (his take on Volkswagen’s Fahrvergnügen advertising campaign), but my true identity lies in being a mom and writer. I live in suburban Baltimore and my craziest adventure of late was a week of Zen skiing. I put baby birds in boxes, call the state police if I see goslings trying to cross the highway, and have adopted two dogs from the SPCA.

But I eat meat. If stranded on a desert island, I would want to bring cases of yogurt. Brie is me. Hail Caesar salad. I’m a grilly girl.

For me, this vegan experience is a journalistic experiment as well as a way to shrink my personal carbon footprint. But now my carbon footprint won’t be made by leather shoes.

Just how challenging is it to become a vegan? I’ll find out soon.

-“Edamommy” Mary Talalay is a writer for KIWI Magazine

One edamommy attempts to cut meat out of her life.

Set meat free, why don’t cha babe

Get out my life, why don’t cha babe

‘Cause you don’t really love meat

You just keep meat hangin’ on

-Adapted from “You Keep Me Hangin’ On” by The Supremes

I have to admit something. For every new challenge or adventure, I pick a theme song. There were some unfortunate choices in the ’80s when I tried out for high school cheerleading (“Eye of the Tiger”); became an aerobics instructor (“Kung Fu Fighting”); and got my first real job (“2 Legit 2 Quit”).

When I decided to go whole-hog vegan, the song that immediately came to mind was “You Keep Me Hangin’ On.” Substitute meat for me in each line and you have a new vegan anthem. Presto!

Going vegan isn’t a delayed New Year’s resolution (although I have several of those). I was not inspired by some bug-eating reality show. I don’t intend to be a top model, idol, big loser, survivor, bachelorette, geek-loving beauty or a home-improvement show host. Just a vegan for as long as I can be-gan.

-”Edamommy” Mary Talalay is a writer for KIWI Magazine