I am trying to figure out how and where to plant a garden in my yard but I have some serious obstacles. As I mentioned before, I have two very wild and crazy dogs (Mya and Stewpot) from Bratislava (kidding) who have the run of my backyard. When I say “run,” it isn’t in jest. They have run through my backyard chasing critters and actually made the pachysandra retreat and die. We have a wooded lot, so there isn’t a perfect spot in the back to plant where I wouldn’t need a 6-ft fence to keep the mutts out.

The front yard is more lush (no dogs) but the deer have realized through their pee-mail network (my husband’s joke – we have email, critters have peemail) that the dogs don’t go there. I really should install a sneeze shield and take-out containers in the front because it is one giant deer salad bar. And, I don’t want to be the eyesore of the neighborhood by building a 6-ft fence around a garden plot (although the neighbor across the way is very unfriendly, which is an incentive to build something and paint it pink).. But I really want to grow vegetables. I refuse to take down trees and container gardening just doesn’t inspire me.

I need an intervention. My mom who is 82 tells me stories about the garden her father planted and how her mom got them through winters during the Depression by canning and storing every fruit and vegetable. We always had a large vegetable garden when I was growing up in Pennsylvania. I actually used to dislike it because one of my chores was weeding it. If I had to write a country song about it, it would be titled: I Was Composting Before Composting Was Cool.